BlancoMon Discovers LocoMon
here’s how
Colon (Christopher Columbus’) “discovers” the Island of Haiti, and plants the flag of absolute ownership over it, claiming it for “Nueva Espaniola” (New Spain).
Here’s how it goes, it’s better than the Avatar the Movie:
One day Colon is introduced to a Great Cacique, chieftain, of the
island and falls instantly impressioned by the old man’s look of
wisdom. He brings him on board to his ship, to show the Cacique
the great marvels of Colon’s people. He takes the Cacique to his
quarters and talks to him through a cross worldly association of
utterances and gestures. The subject that fascinates Colon the most,
religious differences.
Colon is eager to know about this great man’s religious beliefs.
Frustrated, trying to get his own meaning about his own god across,
he calls the sacerdote (priest), that travels on these voyages to
help in these salvation quests too. The priest arrives to the captain’s
cabin, and Colon orders the priest to remove his jeweled cross
pendant from around his neck and give it to Colon. The silver and gold
crucifix is then handed over to the Cacique, and the Priest watches in
disgust and disbelief. The Chieftain looks at it, and nods,
and gives it back. But Columbus gestures for him to take it with
him, and contemplate on it. The Cacique leaves.
Many days later, Colon is pacing the deck of his ship, and any native
that comes to the ship is asked about the whereabouts of this chieftain,
but nobody has any information to give him. He writes in his journal
about the treachery of these people, and the mistrust he should have
had towards them. People that wallow naked, like the day they were
born, on the beach, and subsist simply off the fruits of the ocean
and Island, are never to be trusted, he writes.
The next day he decides to take action and gathers a group of natives
and demands that this old man come to see him or else he will unleash
his fury on them instead. The next day Colon sees the old man in
the horizon, kicking sand pebbles on the beach, and yells to him to come
over. The old man pretends he did not hear, and Colon infuriated,
orders him brought to his bridge.
Colon immediately demands of him the return of his cross. But the old
man replies to him in gesture, “But you gave it to me.” Colon says,
“NO! I want it back.” And the old man says, “I cannot.” ”Why?” Colon
demands. ”Because I have buried it,” the Cacique states. ”What!!!”
Colon states in total disbelief, and demands “Where?” ”Over there,”
as the old man turns pointing. And Colon demands that he be taken to it
immediately. Arriving at the spot the old man points to the location
of its burial, and Colon demands that he dig it up. As the old man
digs and pulls it up from the ground, he shows it to Colon, who at
this point is so enraged has pulled out his sword and draws it through
him. Killing the old wise man on the spot.
Ah Colon, what a simple man he was, for had he understood the Carib
way, he would’ve known that the Cacique was actually honoring his
symbol, for if it really was god, then burying it like a seed it
would’ve grown to be a tree.
So much for trees in America!
LocoMon
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